AITA For Asking My GF To Knit Less?
Hey everyone! So, I need your judgment on something that's been causing a bit of friction between my girlfriend and me. I love her to bits, but her knitting hobby has kinda taken over our lives, and I'm not sure if I'm being unreasonable by asking her to tone it down. Is it an overreaction? Let's dive into the nitty-gritty.
The Knitting Explosion
Okay, so my girlfriend, let’s call her Sarah, is super into knitting. I mean, really into it. It started out as a cute, relaxing hobby, but it's gradually become her entire existence. When she is knitting all of the time it is hard to spend time with her. When she's not at work, she's knitting. We used to watch movies together, go out for dinner, and generally hang out. Now, she's knitting through movies, suggesting we eat in so she can knit, and even brings her knitting to social gatherings. It's gotten to the point where I feel like I'm competing with yarn and needles for her attention. I try to be supportive of her hobbies. For example, I'll pick up new yarn for her. I have even helped her wind yarn into balls before, so she can get straight to knitting. But as of late it has become too much for me. Sometimes I will try to initiate conversation, and she will be too distracted by her knitting.
I know knitting is her passion, and I would never want to take that away from her, but I miss doing things together. I miss having her undivided attention. And honestly, I'm starting to feel a little neglected. So, last night, I gently brought it up, suggesting she might want to consider setting some limits on her knitting time, so we can spend more quality time together. I tried to be as nice as possible, emphasizing that I love her and support her hobbies, but that I also need her attention and companionship.
Her Reaction
Well, let’s just say it didn't go down well. Sarah was really hurt. She accused me of not supporting her interests and trying to control her. She said knitting is her way to de-stress and that I should be happy she has a hobby that makes her happy. Which I am! But, come on, there's a limit, right? She went on about how much joy knitting brings her, how creative it makes her feel, and how it's not just a hobby, it's a part of who she is. I totally get that, but I also feel like I'm a part of her life, and I deserve some of her time and attention too.
She's now giving me the cold shoulder, and I'm starting to wonder if I was in the wrong. Maybe I should just suck it up and let her knit as much as she wants. But then again, I can't help but feel like I'm being a bit steamrolled here. I don't want to be the bad guy, but I also don't want to feel like I'm invisible in my own relationship. Am I out of line for wanting her to balance her hobby with our relationship? Is it unreasonable to ask for a little less knitting and a little more us time? I'm genuinely torn, hence why I'm turning to you, the wise and impartial judges of the internet, to weigh in on this delicate matter. — Mangakalota: Exploring A Hidden Gem
My Defense
To clarify my position, I want to emphasize that I'm not trying to stifle Sarah's creativity or control her free time. I genuinely appreciate that she has a passion and something that brings her joy. My concern is the imbalance it has created in our relationship. We used to do so much together, and now it feels like knitting has taken precedence over everything else. It's not about the knitting itself; it's about the lack of quality time and connection we share. — Kimmel's Kirk Commentary: What You Need To Know
I believe that a healthy relationship involves compromise and mutual consideration. I'm not asking her to give up knitting altogether; I'm simply suggesting that she allocate some time for us as a couple. Maybe we could designate certain evenings as knitting-free zones, or perhaps we could find activities we can enjoy together that don't involve yarn and needles. I'm open to suggestions and willing to compromise, but I need her to acknowledge my feelings and be willing to work towards a solution that benefits both of us. The crux of the problem is that she is not working towards the solution, and refuses to meet me in the middle. — Anonib Not Working: Troubleshooting Guide & Fixes
I also want to point out that I've tried to engage with her knitting hobby. I've asked her about her projects, complimented her creations, and even offered to help with tasks like winding yarn. I'm not completely dismissive of her passion, but I also need her to acknowledge that my needs and feelings are valid too. It feels as though I am putting in all of the effort. This relationship should be a two-way street. So, before you cast your judgments, please consider the whole picture. I'm not trying to be a controlling boyfriend; I'm simply trying to salvage my relationship and find a way to balance our individual passions with our shared life.
AITA?
So, tell me, internet, AITA for asking my girlfriend to stop knitting so much? I'm ready for your verdicts, whether they're gentle or harsh. I just need some perspective on this yarn-filled dilemma.
